I think it's called growing up.

Everyday is a quick,loud,colourful blur.A blur of people,who don't really care.

Of bits of laughter,short-lived happiness,and dreams that will never come true
Everything,is superficial and stupid.
Especially,people.
Have I told you how much the people begin to suck? They don't even listen.
Never,ever.
It's all surreal.
Life feels like a big lie.
It's very meaning is meaninglessness.
It's almost like someone played a cruel joke.
 It only gets worser with every passing minute.
That glimmer of hope slowly dying away.
Giving away..to the weight of reality.
"Open up,get confident,your last chance at it"
"You'll never be good enough"
The voices creep into my head.I wish they'd go away.

My dreams,the only place where everything isn't falling apart.
I wish all of  it would  fall into place instead.

Black,white and beautiful.:)

 

Travellers.

They sat in the back seat of the car,the three of them.
Windows rolled down,sunlight strongly filling its warmth in the car,
Their shiny brown hair blew with the wind.
They played music,emotional music...and all quietly smiled about  it.
Up and down,went the car...the bumpy roads it traversed.
Only making them smile wider.
This was one of life's reflective moments,one of them.
A moment dangling by the threads woven by time.
A moment,where they relished the past and held onto to it,
while they learned to let go of it slowly.
Learned,that the best thing about life is it goes on,and on.
and they were mere travellers on this bumpy road,
through the thrills,the highs and lows.

A world lost and found.

I rediscovered the world in a black leather briefcase.
In it,I found a yellow folder.One that held a bunch of loose papers and a lot more.
They were paintings of the Sunset,planets,abstract art...cartoon sketches.
 Poetry written on loose scraps.
Cards.New year cards,Anniversaries,Birthdays.
It contained the world of make-belief I had once dwelled upon.
One that tries its best to cease to exist.
The land of dreams,fantasies and imaginary friends.
A world of innocence,carefully preserved by my father...in that black leather briefcase.
Those mere bunch of sheets were much more than they were,they really were once what I called ...My Childhood.

I want a bull named Fumachu.

Clear blue sky.
Sun shines bright.
Lemon Yellow butterflies float by.
Country music in my mind.
It's a beautiful day.
Away,away from reality.
Sometimes,solitude isn't all that bad.
...
 

One last wish.

If I had a chance,a wish,
I'd wish you never left.
 I'd wish this were a nightmare,
only if it were as easy as that...

I can still hear your laughter,
I close my eyes to see your goofy smile,
but you're no longer around,
you've left,it's been a while.

And before I go to sleep at night,
I try to say goodbye,
I try to say I miss you,
and I Apologize.

And sometimes it gets so hard to believe,
that all  I have of you is memories,
...that you died on that cold winter night,
and all I could do for you was cry.

If I had a chance,a wish,
Another chance for you ,would be my only wish.
I'd  wish miracles did exist,
that you'd come back and prove all of it.

I'd wish I could say goodbye one last time...
and then I'd see your fading face,
and I'd hold on to all its grace,

and that one last figment of your smile.










  

Unspoken.

You'd turn back to look out,
I'd turn to look at you,
You tried to be discreet,
but I caught you staring too.

Lots of roaring laughter,
and then we'd catch each other in between a smile.
 I was being wishful,I knew it all the while.
I knew you'd never be mine...

You never said a word,
but that one look said it all.
words can't describe how you made me feel,
it all felt so,so real.


It's been a while since I last saw you,
I still remember the moment,
I found myself taking in most of what I could.
Now I smile at the memory, of having a world of our own.